I'm platinum biatch ...

Well, ladies and gentle-folk ... we're sitting here with a 45 minute iBAHN internet card and a sticky european keyboard. Hold on, wait a minute .... don't stop, 'til you get it, get it ...

Okay. Back to life, back to reality. We're giving you the DL from London ... and what a journey it has been. To start, Kate/Beth made to NYC on Tuesday evening and I followed soon after on Wednesday am (just to miss the underwear bomber). I (erika) met Kate (Beth) and the real Kate in Brooklyn (you guys don't know her - I didn't either) to kill some time. We spent 3 hours at the Strand, the greatest bookstore ever, and then spent the rest of our tenure in NYC wandering in a circle for passport pictures to get our Tanzanian visas. Don't worry - there's always "one on the corner" of broadway and canal).

We finally found the sketchiest vendor in all of NYC after walking from Brooklyn to Manhatten. As one co-author found out, the other co-author looked like a meth-head. Little did the meth-head know, you can't smile, wear glasses or earrings during picture time. (Note to all you followers: Ask to see her Tanzanian visa).

Reunited again, with nothing to do but catch a flight ... the authors decided to visit a zebra bar (BIG surprise!). We were brainstorming HOW we could get our hands on Rupleminz - to no avail (To date: We've tried 10 venues - no such luck). We pulled it together and boarded our flight (VS10). As we were ansty during our flight, we mingled around (like LAUREN!!) and went to first-class. Little did we know, we met our first celebrity of our trip - to be discussed later ....

Arrival in London was nothing to talk about; the Heathrow Express was broken ... no bodies on it --- but just wasn't working (welcome to the UK). We arrived, ate some Indian, took a nap ... and prepared for an evening in London. Ventured to Piccadilly and picked up half-price tickets for Billy Elliot. Headed east to Leicester Square, only to see our new boyfriend, Gerard Butler (see our PICS!!! If he looks tired, we know - but he looked like shit on the flight). Jennifer Aniston was jealous, but she got over it.

We had to leave them alone, as Billy was calling our names - as were a few glasses of wine. Brilliant show; Kate/Beth has now decided (again) that she's going to take up tap dancing. Anyone need a date??? Erika will continue on karoake (thanks, mom).

Erika took Kate/Beth down memory lane, only leaving her twice (in pure excitement) to catch the tube before it left. Had a drink at the Malt House. Unfortunately, Frannie was not there, but we enjoyed our drinks regardless.

Bright eyed and bushy-tailed is how Americans rise in Britain! Yeah. Not so much. We headed to the Tanzania house to turn in our mug shot (ask to see pictures) only to be told it'd be rushed (/not happening) for a 4 hour turn-around. Luckily, Kate looked really pretty in her passport show (see above), so he expedited our visas. That - plus some cash. This is Africa (TIA - that's for you, real Kate). In all honesty, we'd love to give a shout-out to the attendant at the Tanzania House. Thanks for processing our visas so quickly!

NOTE TO ANYONE GOING TO TANZANIA: Get your visa in advance.

In celebration of getting our visas, we ventured off to explore London. Portobello Market called; we saw great art, antiques and - of course - a watering hole or two. Sad to say, Erika did NOT purchase the art she's been pining after for four years - but there's always another time. As for Beth, she went to a "resting point (Kristi - you know this one)" - only to discover it's the London version of Stadium Bar & Grill.

You all thought the excitement stopped there, didn't you? NOPE! Headed to Reading, England, to see some of Erika's co-workers. Some things never change ... but you also learn new games. Pass the keyboard. Type a sentence. Repeat.

(Kristi: How were your messages??)

We started a new game on the way back. Erika knew her way around Reading/London ... and Kate/Beth decided she did too. Erika said "fine" ... you lead the way. Worked fine and dandy until Erika couldn't get into the tube (FYI: The 13th time she was denied today - again, we have pictures). Erika met "assistance" again, only to see the blind NOT leading the blind. After finding alternative routes (due to bodies on the track), the twinsies made it back to Kensington.

Ladies & Gentleman ... keep your eyes peeled, because things are starting to light up!!!!

Signing off at 1:30AM (your happy hour). Stalk you soon!

CHEERS!